weird things talks to a future world emperor

Today we’re going to do something a little different on Weird Things. While this blog often talks about bleeding edge and borderline mad science experiments, there hasn’t yet been an interview with a mad scientist whose aim is to conquer the world with his bizarre inventions. Here to rectify that is Dr. Phineas Waldolf Steel, who is currently in the process of conquering our planet with musical experimentation and mind control. His methods may be unorthodox, his music difficult to describe, yet eerily catchy, and his mind is not quite right, as he freely admits himself. But hey, that’s why he’s a mad scientist in the first place and wants to control the world not to wield his powers over lesser mortals, but to make it into a Utopian Playland filled with laughter, fun, infectious steampunk tunes, and perhaps the occasional toy with glowing red eyes and menacing buzz saws for hands.

Q1. So, Dr. Steel, what would you cite as your primary inspiration in your attempts to take over the world?

I simply see a great deal of room for improvement. This planet’s need for a world “make-over” becomes that much more important when we identify the inept individuals who seem to be responsible for maintaining the poor state of society. There are brilliant people in this world with tremendous ideas for advancing our species towards greatness, yet we still find ourselves dealing with the same old problems. This is the result of those who have controlled mankind for thousands of years. This regime of creative suffocation must end if mankind is to reach its ultimate potential. It may also be important to note that I completely lost my mind approximately ten years ago.

Q2. Unlike many others on a mission to rule the world, your stated top priority is to make our planet fun. How do you plan to upgrade and brighten people’s lives if you achieve your goal of ruling the world?

As human beings, we have the ability to harness the creative energy of the universe. The universe and all that bounces around in it, is driven by this creative energy. We must actively use this creative drive as to manifest our brilliant imaginations. When the individual is able to enact their personal, creative talents they are able to reach beyond simple physical existence. They bring something into being which is greater than themselves and it is a tremendously enjoyable experience for the creator. All living things seek pleasure and one’s act of creating, from a sincere source of pure inspiration, brings no greater joy. So this is the single most important action that a human being can take… and it is a great deal of fun. To empower the people of the world to carry out such enjoyable creativity is to make the world a better place, a place full of inspiration, artistry, innovation and entertainment.

Q3. Where do robots fit in your plans for world conquest? What are you thinking of doing with them after global domination has been achieved?

Robots are a very integral part of advancement towards a better tomorrow. There are manyy flaws concerning the current biological format we find ourselves trapped inside of. Our physiology is tremendously out of date and we desperately require an upgrade. Not only shall we find ourselves evolving towards electronic life in the long run, but by introducing intelligent robotics into our daily lives, we would find ourselves increasingly free to put our efforts towards a more creative purpose rather than spending our so much of our personal energy on mere maintenance and survival.

Q4. Most would-be world conquerors tend keep their real agendas quiet, but you’re quite open about your intentions. What prompted you to announce your plan to the general public?

The governments of the world have long utilized carefully designed multiple social programming techniques, propaganda and media manipulation in an effort to deter the masses from reaching their true potential. And if such manipulative techniques were to be understood by all, the “magic” of the “magicians” would cease to be effective. Thusly, I aim to educate the masses on the use of this reality engineering through the most effective teaching technique possible… entertainment.

Q5. How would you describe The Dr. Steel Show to someone unfamiliar with your work? How did it come together? What was your goal for The Dr. Steel Show and do you feel you’ve achieved it?

When I was rejected from art school, I was told that I had no focus. My art portfolio contained everything from cartoons, special effects design, film making, traditional painting and more. This college had no interest in my work, regardless of quality, because they could not place me in a tidy little box. This has been a reoccurring theme throughout my career and is the primary reason why I have gone insane. The Dr. Steel Show is a huge umbrella designed to house all of my creative passions as well as act as a platform on which to present my message of empowerment through play. This reinventing of myself has been intended to embrace my greatly varied interests while also maintaining a singular focused vision. The Dr. Steel Show, World Domination Toys and all that I create are more than exercises in artistry; they are intended as tools to continually build stronger foundations. With each resource gained, I aim to continually expand the possibilities of creation as limitations are systematically removed before me.

Q6. how did you decide to use music as your primary instrument of mind control? What would you cite as the biggest influences on your musical style?

Music is a language that can be understood regardless of race or creed and a tremendously useful learning tool. The unfortunate reality of the matter is that much of today’s mass produced music is teaching listeners to stay focused on self-defeating activities. This message goes hand in hand with much of the advertising and general social programming. My audio experimentation has been, thus far, an attempt to explore some of the programming techniques, and steering them in a different direction while also providing an avenue for creative freedom. Music is but one tool in the arsenal and it is only a fraction of my plan to build a Utopian Playland.

Q7. Will you be looking to employ on techies with a bent towards mad experiments with robotics and A.I. in the future? If so, what would their working environment be like at World Domination Toys?

By all means! It is my goal doesn’t stop at encouraging the creativity of the masses, but to provide passionate visionaries with the resources necessary to refine, explore and carry out their works of passion. This is a long term goal and one that I currently do not have the resources to do at this time. But once I am able to work with the great minds of today, with a shared vision of a world “make over”, I see infinite possibilities emerging as a result. I also have some rather dashing uniforms picked out for them.

[ you can listen to Dr. Steel’s music and catch his show on YouTube ]